Tuesday, December 9, 2014

Empowerment and Change

The rain pours as I write; splashing into the buckets we have set outside to collect the rain water and the sound of the drops hitting the metal roof of our house makes me want to sleep. Most of the snow has melted but there is a bit of it still visible on the patio. The grass on our small lawn is green, contrasting with the brown, once frozen plants leftover from the summer garden.  A blanket of fog lies above the valley where the river flows.  It is December but it looks more like March outside. Mother Nature is quirky.

This day is one for reflection. As the year draws to an end, the daylight hours are short  the nights are long. My biorhythms are finally adjusting.

Below is a link to one of my favorite women/authors. She is so inspiring. I have read at least three of her books, and I plan to read more.

I discovered her book, Crossing to Avalon years ago after reading The Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley..

Crossing to Avalon
Goddesses in EveryWomen
Goddesses in Older Women

I have long felt that by changing myself  helps change the world.  This, and networking through writing and connecting with others with like mind. A change is badly needed; humankind is in dire need of healing and we, as women are more empowered than ever.

I have  three beautiful daughters of whom I am very proud. I have one sister, a blood relative and I love her dearly. We don't agree on everything, but we believe in our family and in loving each other. I have good women friends. These women are my sisters, too, we see each others children as extended family. My mother and I have grown close these past few years.  I have five grandchildren as I write this, two of them are teens, two are pre teens and one is an adorable two year old. This is a great blessing and reminds me of the circle of life; the connectedness of all of us here on the planet.

My goal is to live one day at a time, accept each day as a gift. I believe that together we have the power to make important changes in our world. We can encourage each other to be kind, to be honest, strong, and flexible in the face of change.

“I believe that the thought that women together can change the world is emerging into the minds and hearts of many of us, and that the vessel for personal and planetary evolution is the circle with a spiritual center.”Before you can do something that you’ve never done, you have to be able to imagine it is possible.”  ~Jean Shinoda Bolen~

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

On the Subject of Domestic Violence

Below is a link to my daughter's article that she wrote.  It is worth reading again. I am thankful for her reflections and her understanding. A violent legacy is certainly not one I had planned on.


Sunday, October 12, 2014

Acknowledging Negativity

“Rather than letting our negativity get the better of us, we could acknowledge that right now we feel like a piece of shit and not be squeamish about taking a good look.” 
~Pema Chodron~

Writing is my deliverance, my gift, and my responsibility. My dad in the later years of his life decided to set down his memoirs and to record some of the history of our family, as my grandfather, his father, did before him. It was a significant legacy, one that I don’t take for granted. We learn who we are from history, whether it be world history or our personal stories. I am compelled to continue to weave this thread of commonality of family and of life.
Too many times in daily life I struggle to maintain my center.  The inner landscape is sometimes bumpy and I long for a smooth, even road, especially at this point in my life. I am in my 66th year here on this planet, for pity’s sake!  The challenge is to become an authentic being, to draw boundaries and recognize my weaknesses and strengths. What I crave most is connection, with my inner self and with others.
It takes courage to tell the story. Writing is my lifeline and it is also my biggest challenge.  The fear is that others will be offended or hurt if I am honest. I won’t get very far that way; certainly. I understand the reason for fiction and pen names, for a writer can cloak herself in a part; much like playing on stage.
            I suppose that objectivity is key, all the while delving into the subconscious and peeling back the layers of defense.  There have been times in the past couple of years or so that I’ve been feeling displaced and uncertain of my position, my purpose in life. Triggers from the past sent me spiraling downward into despair, frustration, anger and confusion. This being said I don’t blame others, or situations for my emotions.  I have made choices and decisions in my life and I am reaping both the benefits and the consequences.
            When I was a young mother I was battered by my then husband and separated from my two oldest children. This has haunted me for years.  My self esteem was battered along with my body, not to mention the damage that was done to the children.  This trauma has been my cross to bear, and also my salvation, because I was forced to become strong, to face the pain, to acknowledge my strength, to find the courage to heal myself for my own sake, and for others, because we are all connected.           
Negativity is what it is, simply. The point is not to wallow in it, to allow pessimism and doubts dominate my thoughts. This is not to say to ignore a painful emotion; I feel what I feel at any given moment. I believe a person should acknowledge what is and not deny or judge a feeling. An emotion is what it is.